Saturday, August 28, 2010

Uva uvam vivendo varia.

"It was a mistake, coming into other people's country
It only disturbed them and led to things like the dead boy. People wouldn't understand, wouldn't know that they were friendly.
It would have been so much better to stay where they had lived, by the old river. Deets felt a longing to be back, to sit in the corrals at night and wonder about the moon. Many a time he had dozed off, wondering about the moon..."
Lonesome Dove, Larry McMurtry

A quote from my latest read novel, and one that felt strangely coherent with my current state.
[Comfort vs. Adventure
Routine vs. The Unknown
Contentment vs. Desire]

My dad asked me the other day if I would be interested in an internship, one that was far away. It would be a clean start and a killer addition to the resume, yes, but it would also be a commitment nonetheless. I was hesitant to immediately agree to applying because I was finally in a niche with my current job and state of living. 
But then again, is said "current job" taking me places in life? No, not really. Is said "current state of living" one of permanence? It surely was never intended to be so.

Though the quest endured in Lonesome Dove ultimately ended with numerous deaths and disastrous occurrences, it also came away with a general sense of accomplishment, newfound territory, stronger interrelationships, and self realization.

Relating this back to my present situation, to remain here and turn down the opportunity, for example, would be a safe decision. I am content and relatively happy, after all. I do not necessarily long for something more, but I am also not ignorant to the vast amounts of other possibilities.
Aside from my family, I think that this city has graciously given to me all that it has to offer. It is time to take a leap of faith and to make things happen. I have done it before, and I can certainly do it again.

I am not going to be afraid of change, and distance will not be an obstacle if it is ever a factor. 
I want to make the most of myself and focus on ME while I am still allowed to be selfish enough to do so.
Dear Opportunity,
It's me. And I'm ready.


  1. this sounds like a great opportunity! I'm happy for you!

  2. Take it girl, grasp that opportunity! I can't wait to hear more about your internship and the new travels/adventure that you will come upon! :)

  3. LONESOME DOVE...a great of my very favorites. As a matter of fact, it was your Dad's copy I borrowed the first time I read it all those years ago. Paraphrasing the title of one of Thomas Earl's better songs, regarding your life decision: "Listen to YOUR Heart" can always come back's where your heart is! I LOVE YOU from your biggest fan: Aunt Cathy