Fate my friend, you say the strangest things.

Upon skimming through various blog posts alongside countless Facebook photo albums, I am beginning to wonder how "healthy" such actions are for the average social networking peruser. Other's errands and outings are translated into a Twitter update. Trips out of town are documented through specified Facebook photo albums. And cameras are a necessity when adhering to household projects or works of art in order to capture every step of the way. 

It is so easy to share information about oneself with the world, but then again, is it really necessary for us [the readers] to know that much about another person's life?

How much of social networking translates to mindless fun, and how much of it is pure narcism?

While I can typically categorize my Facebook browsing into the "Empty Entertainment" department, today I came across a blurb about travel that was posted by a peer; and traveling, mind you, is my one and only vice. Though I try not to, I tend to become envious of those who were fortunate to be born into a family with the means to send their child off to Europe multiple times before they have graduated college. I wish that such things could come to me so easily.

These are the times that I resent Facebook.

I would have never been presented with such situations had I no account, after all.

As I begin to think about it I wonder if this type of phenomenon happens to others as well.

For example,

Do those who can't seem to strike gold [or even silver] in relationships cringe when they see countless photos of "perfect" or "happy" couples?

I wonder if bikini photos effect the Facebook users that may have poor body image.

For those who feel that they have yet to find their niche in life, do statuses about how a peer was offered a perfect job cause a longing in its reader? A longing for something similar?

Maybe it is just me. But whatever happened to the days when a person went on a vacation and took photos with the sole purpose of development so as to create memories for THEMSELVES and not for the public?

Since social networks are not in any way on the out in the foreseeable future, it is important that I keep in mind to count my blessings. No, I cannot travel as easily as others, but I do have a significant someone who is loyal, treats me well, and is extremely loving. And that definitely counts for something.

Nobody has everything. Every single person has a void, even if their Facebook page seems to differ. We just need to look beyond the superficial to find it.

It is a simple concept, but sometimes we need to be reminded.

This and that.

This:

I did it! I put blonde in my hair, and I'm ecstatic! Next time I go to the salon I am going to ask for a reddish tint to get a Strawberry Blonde affect in time for summer. Thank you for all of your input!

I think that I look like a brighter and happier person all the way around.

That:

And not that I agree with this nor does it relate to any of the aforementioned, but I found this funny and worthy of a share.

Really?!

While I sincerely hope that everybody out there is enjoying a hopeful, eventful, and fresh start to the new year, please keep me in your thoughts as my year is not up to the most fantastic of beginnings.

December 31, 2010: a hit and run ensues (and my car is the victim) to which the damage is not discovered until the following morning.

January 1, 2011: I am stricken with a fairly debilitating illness

January 2, 2011: illness continues and leaves me bedridden

January 3, 2011: beginning to regain strength, though still experiencing periods of fatigue

So much for a clean slate! Thanks a lot, Mother Nature.

It is only three days into the new year, and because of this unexpected turn of events I already feel like I am behind. My lack of energy bas prohibited and limited any progress in car searches, job searches, school searches, laundry and cleaning, editing, blog updates, etcetera.

I pray that tomorrow brings to me a refreshing dose of stamina and vigor as I am sick of my bedroom and would thoroughly enjoy being able to go outside into the fresh air without becoming faint after a simple trip down the stairs.

Wish me luck!

Beginning the End.

Today is my last Monday working at my internship in Washington DC! 

As excited as I am to put the experience behind me and to go forth, I am also severely humbled by the fact that I am essentially back to square one.

Job searching is a terribly frustrating process.

Que?

Listening to languages with an untrained ear is an interesting concept. When you don't know what to listen for, all of the words and sentences run together as one.

My Colombian sister once told me that prior to learning the English language, she thought that it sounded like we conversed underwater. I assume that this is due to our excessive usage of the letter "w."

My previous two sentences are fantastic example- "(w)once" "we" "were" "water" "lang(w)age."

I totally get it.
I could relate to her in this moment because, prior to learning Spanish, it always sounded to me that native Spanish speakers talked a kajillion miles per minute...must be something in the water.

It is an idea similar to any adjustment, I suppose. It is simply a matter of taking the time to think it through. Take, for example, the very first day of college (or work)- how expansive were the grounds, how foreign were the faces, and how unfamiliar were the routines. Four years later and you could undoubtedly walk the length of the entire campus with your eyes closed.

Impressive as that is, do you ever stop to think about that coveted first day when your perspective was so fresh and so untainted? When you didn't know what to look for or where to start?

When something has become so monotonously familiar it is difficult to believe that it could ever have emitted any degree of intimidation or confusion.
But it did.

asdfjklk;

ScAtteRbrAineD.

Tomorrow I go back to D.C. Just three weeks left. Begin the countdown.

Wanting a permanent address. Not ready for a permanent address.

Being a good role model is important. Who decides what a "good role model" is or isn't?

Knock, knock. Who is there? A job. Really?! No, not really.

A never ending list of things to do- that's life.

The holidays are here!

Blogging?

I just don't feel like it. 

I'm at home visiting my family and friends for NINE whole days.

And I plan on making the most of it.

So,

I'll see you when I see you.

okiknow.

I know that it isn't recommended to fill emotional voids with superficial, material things- like, for example, really awesome clothes, shoes, and accessories...

But I'd be lying out of my teeth if I said that it didn't bring a smile to this girl's face.

See?!

I don't hesitate to say that any girl would succumb to the power of a three story Forever 21- especially if it were only a 10 minute metro ride away.

Relief.

So, I had a problem. Except, it wasn't actually a problem. More of a dilemma.

I couldn't decide if I wanted this thing.
There was a pretty good chance that I could attain this thing.
And there were many benefits that would have been associated with this thing.

However, I couldn't decide if I actually wanted this thing, if I was willing to sacrifice for this thing, or if this thing was right for me.
So I stressed out.

And I pondered.
And I lashed out and acted like a three year old.

And then I prayed.

Because as much as I wanted to follow my instincts, I couldn't decipher what they were.

Then, it finally happened. Clarity.

And due to various circumstances, all points related to said thing didn't work out. 
Coincidentally, this is what I wanted to happen.

I wasn't unqualified or anything like that.
On the contrary, I heard that I was a hit.

It just wasn't right.

And they knew it.

And I knew it.

And now I'm happy.

But still thingless.

Oh well, one day it will work out.

Oh yeah, substitute the word thing with the word job, and this might all make more sense.

Gym Class Hero.

Merely moments ago I was routinely hitting the gym for a moderately challenging cardio workout. Thanks for sharing, Emmy. Do you want a trophy?

Well, yes I do want one of those. However, that is not the point of this story, which actually does contain one.

An undertaking that I habitually indulge in while engulfed in my run/elliptical/stair-master/bike routine is to compete with the person on the machine that is directly to my right. That is, every so often I will subtly glance at their machine's info board and compare statuses- total miles ran, calories burned, level, time, etc.

I do not do this purposely, and I do not have an explanation as to why the person to my right is always my opponent as opposed to the one on the left. I do, however, always strive to make it a fair race (though unknowing on their part) by taking into consideration which one of us began their workout first coupled with a comparison of the challenger's weight, gender, and age.

While I repeatedly observe this personal habit and while it irks me to no end, I do nothing to put a stop to the practice because I find that I always work that much harder than I do if riding solo.

I want to "win" because it makes me feel good.

Today, I knew that I had my work cut out for me as my oblivious competition and I arrived at our cardio machines at the exact same time. Oh, a challenge eh? (<- I'm not really Canadian so I don't know why I added that.)

This girl meant business. Equipped with two sweatbands (for her wrist and forehead), a pair of sweatpants, a wife beater, and an attachable mp3 player- I'd be blatantly lying if I said that I wasn't a little intimidated...or a lot intimidated. Clearly this girl was either a marine in training or perhaps even a professional boxer in her spare time. Be it as it may, she embodied perfectly the persona of one who actually works out for fun. You know, enjoys it.
For a brief moment I even thought that perhaps she plays the same game that I play since the two of us were stretching at the same time, approached the machine at the same time, and then flipped on our miniature TVs at the same time.

Oh, it's going down.

It didn't take long for me to realize, however, that I had made a horrible mistake in my assumption and that the inferred race was all in my head and my head alone.

To put it simply, I have never seen a person text so much while elliptical-izing! Actually, I've never seen a person text during a workout, period. Text once and it is understood. Text twice and it is forgiven. Text three times and why are you here?! Clearly trumping me and my workout was not on her list of priorities. Every few minutes as I glanced at her machine's info board I would become very disappointed as the words "Pedal faster" flashed mockingly on the screen. She was so distracted by her phone that she could hardly handle the two at the same time.

She obviously can work out as hard or as easy she desires, and I understand that. It was just a bit inconsiderate of her to get on the machine next to me, get my hopes up, and then completely fail at delivering. By the end of my workout I had burned off twice the amount of calories as she. 

Yes, I felt awesome about myself, but it is the principle of the matter that is important! When you begin a workout on a cardio machine that is located directly to my right, you better be ready to work it!

What color is my hair?

No, seriously.

What color?

I asked three different people at work today this exact same question and received three very different, but confident answers:

brown

red

strawberry blonde.

Clearly?!

I personally have always thought that my hair had a reddish tint- at times it is definitely more apparent than others. I suppose that the color's current washed-out state doesn't do it much justice.

Either way, I've held tight to various shades of this color for several years now, and earlier in the week I decided that I need change. Part of me wants to go dark brown, part of me wants to go lighter, part of me isn't ready to stray too differently from its current color in fear that a biting inner jealousy would arise every time I pass a girl on the street with this same color. I'm quite partial to red tones.

I had a decision made earlier in the day that I wanted to flaunt my pale skin and go dark and luscious. Then I made the mistake of reading.

Internet forums far and wide are convincing me that this is not such a good idea, stating that too dark of hair tends to make pale skinned girls look washed out or older. Well, that's not fair. How come celebrity pale skinned beauties don't look washed out or old?

Then I read that, generally, if a girl was blonde as a child then she will more than likely be able to pull it off when she is older. Well, I was a natural blonde until the sixth grade when my hair started to gradually and inexplicably grow in a darker shade.

Whatever.

I have a hair appointment on Saturday.

I don't know what I want to do.
I do know that I don't want it to be boring.

Whatever again.

This post is nonsense.

THANKS!...

...to the most important people in my life.

You're helping me through this transition, and you don't even realize it.

Dear Emmy,

Dear Emmy,

Thank you for not transferring schools after your freshman year like you were hoping to do.

It was hard at first to go to a school so far away from your friends and then-boyfriend.

But I'm glad that you took the risk that others would have been too scared to try.

You grew in countless ways and are better for it now.

I'm glad that I could provide the basis for some of the greatest years of your life thus far.

You will do great things someday!

Sincerely,

The University of Tennessee

___________

Dear Emmy,

Remember when I made you so anxious that you felt sick to your stomach?

Luckily, that feeling didn't last.

I know that I was intimidating and a bit scary- a foreign country, a foreign family, a foreign language, and a group of students that, essentially, were also foreign.

However, aside from frightening, wasn't it also the most fun, rewarding, and emotionally satisfying trip of your life?!

Cultural experience and lifelong friendships were well worth your efforts. So a congratulations to you!

Sincerely,

Spain

___________

Dear Emmy,

I know this is sudden, but do not feel alarmed.

This will be good for you.

Life is short. Take this chance.

Work your hardest and you will reap my benefits.

Sincerely,

Washington D.C.

Later this month I will begin my internship in the very city that holds our nation's capitol. Modest by nature, I have doubts as to whether or not I will succeed in this endeavor, but I truly am trying to stay positive. My biggest immediate worry, after all, will be learning the inner workings of the metro station.

These next couple of weeks will be hectic to say the least- packing, birthday, moving, settling.

Ready, Set, Go!

Ahahahahaha. Haha. Ha.

Last night I pulled out from the depths of a closet a classic favorite of mine- Pictionary.

I hadn't played it in the longest time and thought that it would be a fun idea to play it with the boyfriend. Upon beginning the game I knew that Eliot wasn't exactly the most creative person in the world, however, nothing could quite prepare me for the events that would follow.

A show of hands from those who can accurately declare what is portrayed in the following photograph:

Anyone?

Come on, take a guess.

My guess, for example, was...a really tall mushroom with protruding roots, a dog, and an armadillo on steroids.

The correct answer, you ask?

As Eliot hung his head in utter shame he explained that the picture actually contained drawings of a giraffe, a dog (score!), and an elephant!
His word that he was so diligently attempting to characterize was "Animals."

?!?!?@#$%!?!?!

Eliot, have you ever actually SEEN these animals before? Because I can assure you that your doodle is in no way reminiscent of their true to life form.

In conclusion, today I am taking him to the zoo.

=)

Hello Stream of Consciousness.

Am I really one of those girls that suffer from mild separation anxiety when her boyfriend leaves?

No, not really.

Today, however, is different.

As I helped pack the little white chevy for its one way trip to Knoxville, emotions of all sorts were rising to the surface. It had finally hit me that I wasn't going back to school. I was sure that this was bound to occur, but I was not sure as to how it would feel when it did.

I feel bland- a dull variation of mental states.

All of my brothers and sisters, friends and boyfriend are returning to some form of educational establishment.

I wish I were joining them.

Excitement and fresh starts are visibly surrounding me in every direction, and for the first time in my life I feel none of it.

As a child I could have probably been considered a minority because I was one of those rare kids who truly loved to go to school. "Mental health days," as my mom called them, were a rare occasion for me, and in college I even hesitated to skip class because "I might miss something."

I truly cherish the process of learning and the educational environment as a whole.

It's a foreign feeling to not go to school after 15+ years of being taught that it is indeed what we are supposed to do.

I think graduate school will definitely be in my future, after all. 

As soon as I figure out what I am passionate about career wise, I will be hitting the books immediately.

Though I am not living in the most ideal situation at the present time nor working at an ideal post college job, I simply have to keep in mind that my life will fall into place eventually. And it will do so when the time is right.

That aside, my goal for this coming year is to truly gain a bond with my siblings, and I am thankful to be given the opportunity to do so now. With an age difference as vast as ours and an adoption that took place while I was already in the midst of my college career, life's obstacles have seemed to take a toll on the six of us and our relationships with each other.

As the oldest I have always felt a strong sense of responsibility, and I think that if I can accomplish a stronger connection with each sibling then this year just might not be so bad, despite my void of the collegiate lifestyle.

100TH POST!

I made it to the century mark! The big one zero zero! 100 blog posts strong!
I've been looking so forward to this moment, and it feels fantastic that I have actually been able to keep up with this for so long!
And I am in no way slowing down, true statement.

Here are three photos that summarize in full my latest adventure to Destin.

More great news! My life is on its way to regaining its long lost stability. Aside from a mild upcoming relapse scheduled to ensue this week when I will be driving to Georgia for anticipatedly one of the greatest concerts ever (Arcade Fire), I have returned to my former place of employment and should be back on a regular schedule beginning next week!

I am so grateful at the moment, but it is only a matter of time before I am assuredly longing once again for my current life style- that of spontaneity and absolute carefree bliss!

Summer is ending soon.

Autumn approaches, 
and with great ernest.

Horribly Ironic.

A couple of weeks ago my dad and stepmom took ownership of a mama dog and her puppies that were bred in a puppy mill with the intentions of demonstrating the idea of caring for new life to the children. If aware of what these so called "puppy mills" are capable of, one would understand the need of rescue for such animals. These sorts of operations tend to put profit as a forefront at all times and thus, the welfare of the puppies are subpar at best.

I was introduced to the mom, that was deemed the name Sweetie Pie, and her five puppies around two weeks ago. At this time, the number of puppies had already dwindled to only three. Two were still horribly tiny and malnourished for their age, and they too wouldn't live beyond the next few days.

The veterinarian told us that this precedence of events was commonly known as "Fading Puppy Syndrome." In this scenario some puppies, despite the proper care and feeding habits, grow poorly and do not survive due to a number of reasons that could be initiated simply by being born into an unsterile environment.

Fortunately, one puppy has managed to survive thus far, and his name is Rex. He was always a frontrunner as he has been quite larger than his kin from the get go. I sure hope that he makes it.

Look at how ADORABLE the little guy is!

 

It is unfortunate that the situation took the dire turn that it did. Instead of teaching the children about new life, my parents found themselves repeatedly being forced to teach the kids about death. For the time being, however, I am glad to say that Sweetie Pie and her son Rex are doing fabulously under the proper care. Rex is thriving more and more everyday, and I hope and pray that he has a future after all.

Epic Fail.

A Cooking Story.

Once upon a time I had a brand new recipe- a dessert recipe- that I was oh so eager to try out for the very first time. They are called "mega morsel bars," and they are a mixture that when concocted properly make up a chocolate chip cookie peanut butter brownie, in a sense. Is your mouth watering yet?

Before the following story unfolds, it is important to know that my baking skills are nothing to brag about by any means. It's almost comical as to how I essentially mess up anything that I ever attempt to cook.

Unfortunately, this story does not stray far from the pattern...

Let us cut to the chase.
Last night I decided to put the recipe to the ultimate test.

With the directions printed and in hand, my partner in crime (best friend) and I drove to three, count them, THREE different locations to acquire all of the necessary ingredients.

Once acquired, the night ensued and excitement began to mount. During the baking period I did nothing but proudly brag and boast about how delicious the finished product would be. I was going about the procedure with the utmost of care in order to ensure perfection. As the instructions insisted, when I was finished mixing all of the ingredients together, I placed the dish into the oven for promptly 18 minutes and digressed up the stairs.

22+ minutes later I returned to the kitchen horrified only to discover that the timer had been going off for quite some time, how long exactly could not be determined. I frantically grabbed the potholders and removed the dessert from the stove in one fell swoop.

Burnt.

However, that wasn't our only problem. As their name implies, these desserts were supposed to result in a bar-like shape and contour not unlike that of a rice crispy treat, for example.

What we had sitting in the tray in front of us, on the other hand, was a flat, squishy 13x9 rectangle- nothing bar-like about the dessert whatsoever.

Something had gone horribly wrong.

Being fat kids at heart, however, my best friend and I couldn't wait to dive fork first into the piping hot and chewy creation, despite its unknown affliction. After tasting, I had an epiphany. Aha!

Overnight! It is supposed to sit overnight before being eaten! That is the problem!

(P.S. That wasn't the problem.)

The next morning I was overwhelmed with the feeling of disappointment as there was no change to the dessert's texture.

Scratching my head, I took a gander at the recipe once more.

As I skimmed the recipe, eyes squinched, and mouth parted while reading off the ingredients one by one under my breath, I came to a halt.

My heart stopped.

"1 1/2 cups of flour," it read.

I rewound my mind to the beginning of the previous night's events. The mark to the left of the "1/2" that I had so hurriedly mistaken to be a bullet point was in actuality a NUMERAL. A number! A 1!

An entire cup of flour went unnoticed, and thus, forgotten.

Oh, I am so distraught I could just KICK myself if only I were limber enough to do so!!

I  reeeally hope that my future husband knows how to cook.

I'm truly convinced that there is no hope for me.

Taboo.

Everyone has played or at least heard of the game Taboo, correct?

As a precaution, I will explain the premise of the game anyhow.

In lamen's terms, one player picks up a card with a specific word that he or she has to describe to their teammates. However, there is a catch. There are 5 related words on each card, and if any of these said words are included in the player's description, the team is deducted a point and the word is discarded.

Though it is a game primarily played with teams, my brothers and sisters and I will sometimes play one on one just for fun.

Tonight my stepmom sent out an e-mail saying that she had played with Jack (my 7 year old brother) earlier in the evening and was shocked as to how knowledgeable he is at this age.

I wish everyone of you could meet this boy in person. He has more wit at age 7 than I have now at 21.

Here are some of his descriptions. I'm probably bias, but I simply thought that these were really cute and worthy of sharing.

PAT:  “This is a name….. or a hit.” My stepmom said she just couldn't figure out what the word was.  As frustration was clearly mounting, he finally shouted, “one of my uncle’s has this name.”  Aaahhhh…PAT!

KETTLE:  “Popcorn without the corn.”  (Somehow she guessed Kettle Corn).  He said, “shorten it.”

COTTON CANDY:  “This is in our clothes" (she guessed cotton)…"And the prizes I got today at Chuck E. Cheese, except the rocket”…(she guessed CANDY).  "Then put them together"…Cotton Candy.

CONDUCTOR: “When a band plays, and the one in front has a stick in his hand.” (I didn’t even know he knew this word).

EASTER:  “It is after church, I  mean what was it called, oh yeah, Holy Week.  It is the last day of Holy Week.”  It was so surprising (in a good way) that he went about describing this word excluding anything to do with eggs or bunnies.

ALONE:  “This was the name of a movie during Christmas and the boy was left at home.”  (She guessed HOME ALONE). He said, "Shorten it.”

CIRCLE:  “This is like an oval but squenched down some.”  Haha, this was my personal favorite.

ADAM:  “He was the man here before any of us.”  When my stepmom guessed Adam, he said, “I couldn’t use the word 'first.'” 

Such a smart kid!

I love you, Jack!

P.S. In regards to yesterday's post, I gave in. I blew it. I told Eliot to read my blog and to read about my surprise! I couldn't take the suspense any longer, and I was about to burst!
Oy, this is a problem.

D.C. Bound

About an hour and a half ago my dad called me. The conversation went a little something as follows:

Dad: "Hey."

Me: "Hey."

Dad: "What are you doing this week?"

Me: (job searching, tanning, hanging out with friends, cooking boyfriend dinner) "Mmm, nothing."

Dad: "Want to go to Washington with me this week?"

Me: (briefly weighs out the pros and cons of each decision, either staying or going- D.C. quickly takes the cake) Sure!"

Dad: "Alright then, be ready at noon."

Me: "Ooooookie dokie."

So there you have it. It seems that I am off again on yet another spontaneous adventure of traveling!

Though there are many aspects to this trip that are not going to be all fun and games, I am still very excited for the vacation.

Yay for a legitimate reason to put off job searching for another ENTIRE week!

I will have my computer and camera in tow so updates are unavoidable.

Bye Bye kids, have a safe week!